Alexandra: I still wonder why Louis didn’t put her through to the finals two years ago (which Simon gleefully reminds us about all the time). It makes you think that, for a judge in a talent show, he’s not very good at judging talent. Alex is very impressive, even though I’m no fan of that Mariah-esque, R&B stlye. She could follow quickly in Leona’s steps given half a chance.

Diane: Vocally, she’s a bit of a Bjork-alike but that’s no bad thing, I quite like her. In talent show terms, she reminds me of Alex Parks who won Fame Academy. I’d be more than happy if she wins.

Eoghan: A few weeks ago, Mrs F said “Doesn’t Eoghan look like a Fraggle?!”, and now I can’t get that image out of my head. Sang his heart out on Saturday, which was the first time I had to concede he was doing okay. Usually, I sing a chorus of “Down at Fraggle Rock” over whatever he’s singing to try and drown out the noise.

JLS: Again, not my favourite kind of music but I do quite enjoy the comedy element that they put in their VT’s and they seem to have a bit of personality. A Beatles’ medley though… how very dare they!

Rachel: Anyone else think that her demeanor on Saturday was not 100% influenced by natural products. The way she bounded out for the sing-off and flitted around in a style completely at odds with the song. Something not quite right there. If she went out and won this thing, I fear that she could follow the Amy Winehouse Experience in more ways than one.

Ruth: I really like her even though I can’t ever imagine buying anything that she might go on to release. The lack of a natural, geographical fan base will sure mean the end for her sooner rather than later.

Time to judge the judges.

Cheryl: The nation’s new sweetheart…. has done wonders for her “celeb career” by being involved in this. Am I shallow for liking her?

Danii: I’m really undecided about Danii. Her banal and over-enthusiastic utterances must mean something to someone… but not me. I have no idea what she’s talking about most of the time.

Simon: Still always seems to get most of his criticisms spot on. However, in the privacy of his own home I bet he knows Eoghan is nowhere near good enough to win.

Louis: For the love of all things holy, would someone put him out of our misery. The way he jigs about and sings along to JLS makes me want to scream. So I do.

…and don’t get me started on “I’m a Celeb”

Here, the name JJ Abrams on the credits, seems to guarantee a certain predictable quality. Not that this is a bad thing: there’s nothing wrong with quality after all. However, the fact that we will have mysterious sub-plots slowly unravelling in the background while the main story gives us quirky but likeable characters dabbling in odd goings-on, has been seen before in Lost and Alias beforehand.

Erm… Fringe is quite like the X-Files (there, I’ve done it).  We get the FBI investigating wierd events but instead of Mulder and Scully we get Agent Dunham and Peter Bishop with a carnbon copy sexual frisson that exists between them.  In place of the Lone Gunmen but in a much more significant role we get to see Dr Walter Bishop played by the chap who was the Steward in Lord Of The Rings.  Even Agent Skinner gets a replacement in the form of Broyles, who acts suspiciously so that the viewer can never quite trust him.  Acting wise, its all by the numbers…. not too bad but not setting the screen alight either.  Some character back stories seem to be lining up to give these folk the chance to shine later on.

All in all there’s some quite enjoyable stuff, even if it is liberally sprinkled with cheese now and again (see, The Observer who fulfills that latter role with aplomb).

If everyone who ever made an error of judgement (and/or upset someone) while doing their job was hounded out of employment then there would be almost no people left working at all. The fact of the matter is that there must be about a million incidents of things being broadcast that are far, far worse or more offensive than last weekend’s Russell Brand show and nothing happens to address them. I listened to the incident fairly soon after the link was posted on Andrew Collins’ site on Monday afternoon and was quite nonplussed (and, dare I say, very mildly amused). May be it’s my age or liberal disposition, who knows? And, to be honest, who cares? My personal tastes should not dictate what the BBC broadcasts but neither should anyone else’s.

So, it seems that certain elements of the press who are always keen to peddle anti-BBC sentiment, got to hear about some near the knuckle broadcast. If it was anyone other than this high-profile and overpaid pair, then we’d have heard nothing more about it and the two people who did complain about the profanities during the show would have had their simple letter of apology. However, the fact that it was Ross and Brand meant that the Daily Mail’s of the world had some celebrity angle to work with. Not just that, but also the fact that the salaries of those celebs had been widely and perhaps justly criticised in the past, and equally that we are dealing with two people who, it has to said, can be quite easy to dislike. A perfect allignment of the planets, then, for those who want to bash the Beeb (see Richard Littlejohn for illustration). However, regardless of how interesting the debate may be, it is still largely irrelevant and Ross and Brand, let alone Lesley Douglas, should never have found themselves in this siuation.

David Tennant’s legacy to show will live long in the memory and on this blog that has featured so much Who-related material in its short life, I could not let this go without my own small tribute. David Tennant brought a boundless energy to being the Doctor when both in character and off screen. From the moment he utterred the phrase “Mmmm, new teeth” to whatever swansong RTD has planned, he has remained happy to make public appearances and to sign anything for anyone with a kind word and that beaming smile. I remain certain that his relationship with the show will continue long passed the time when his tenure has expired. He is a fan and always has been and, I daresay, always will be. Such is the level of his contribution he has single-handedly made fandom acceptable, nay, cool, nay, sexy.  Okay a step too far, just cool perhaps. One thing is for sure… he has timed his departure perfectly and there is only one way his career will go from here… onwards and updwards.

“If there’s a God, he is laughing at us and our football team.” Ben Folds, Effington, 2008

My club, the once glorious Tottenham Hotspur, are a laughing stock. I had the misfortune to watch our recent away trips to Stoke in the Premier League and to Udinese in the UEFA Cup and it was not a pleasant experience.  Of course, the coverage (this is, after all, a TV blog and not a sports one) was supremely impressive on Sky Sports 1HD with crystal clear pictures, great sound, good commentary and punditry, and a wow factor on the visuals. Over on the rebranded “five” (with the exception of Colin Murray, with whom I am regularly impressed) it was like a throwback to ITV’s Big Match of the 1980s.

But this is not a missive about TV, it’s about a club in decline. Before this season started and after the Martin Jol debacle of last season there was talk about Spurs breaking into the inner circle of the top four.  Not from me, I hasten to add, but I confess to being somewhat optimistic after the pre-season results. Now, well…. top four in the Championship, perhaps.

To find out what’s going (or gone) wrong one needs to trace the problems back to the cause (not the effect) because last season was remarkably similar to this one, if not quite as extreme. We had a good manager and plenty of pre-season confidence having finished 5th the year before. This season we have a good manager and plenty of pre-season optimism having won the Carling Cup the year before and outplaying Arsenal and Chelsea on the way. Last year’s bad start led to the overthrow of Jol who was almost harrassed out of his job. This year we are in an exponentially worse position, so you have to wonder how long Ramos has left.

However, these facts are just effects. Daniel Levy to a lesser extent and Damien Comolli to a greater one, seem to be the cause because it is them who sold the family jewels (Defoe, Keane and Berbatov) without any obvious plan for replacements and they are the ones who unceremoniously and unprofessionally got rid of Jol.  Having a Diretcor of Football simply does not work in the Premier League.  Do any of the top four have one?  No.  Do Newcastle have one?  Yes.  God help us.

On the pitch it is a horror story… lacklustre, rudderless and without a clue.  Even Ledley King, could not salvage anything from last night’s UEFA Cup adventure.  The strange thing is that we’re not losing by much.  No-one has scored more that two past us and we have gone through periods (ironically after Bale’s dismissal on Sunday and again for the first 20-minutes until Gomez’ howler yesterday) when we have looked like a good unit.  However, as soon as a goal goes in, head’s drop, no-one wants the ball, and it descends in to a disjointed mess. This is spiralling out of control.  Jonathan Woodgate has been talking this morning and has hit the nail on the head. Read it.  And weep.

Don’t get me wrong. There is plenty of criticism that Ramos has to answer too. His selection policy seems odd bordering on the random (even Benitez and Ranieri would raise an eyebrow) with players frequently out of position, and tactics that seem to vary at a whim.  Watch the players after a substitution and see puzzled looks and lots of shouting at one another. They do not know what is happening, so no wonder they can’t cope on the field. Someone once said “It takes a lot of practice to be this lucky”, for Spurs, it’ll take a helluva lot of practice to turn this around.

Nimueh, Nimueh, Nimueh, Nimueh, In the jungle, the mighty jungle, the lion sleeps tonight.

Apart from trying to crowbar the character’s names in popular songs, there’s also a lot of genuine enjoyment to be gleaned from BBC1’s latest stab at filling the “Doctor Who Slot”. Merlin has a kind of 21st century sheen to it that is remarkably similar to the revitalised Robin Hood, which, if you’re a fan of gritty realism, is really going to turn you off from the start. The slick veneer of beautiful people (more about them later), polished floors and gleaming sets throws the idea that this is in any way a medieval drama in to a cocked hat. However, if you can overcome this and accept that much, if not all, dramatic reconstruction reflects more about the real world in which it was produced rather than the fictional world that it portrays, then we can find some real potential here in Camelot.

I’m no big connoisseur of Arthurian legend but I imagine these tales of derring-do between a Merlin and an Arthur who are barely out of their teens flies in the face of the established canon. Having said that, I watched the film Excalibur at the behest of The Other Viewer a week or so ago on the understanding that it would be “the real story and that other kid’s show was just a bit of fluff”. Other than the occasional “Ooh, doesn’t Helen Mirren look young” comment, there was little to commend it and I have never seen a tale so in need of “re-imagining”.  Hats off then to Auntie for being brave enough to try something different with it. Anyway, almost by definition, legends need to be retold, so retelling this again could be argued to be in keeping with tradition.

As is the way these days, casting seems to have been based on young actors who would look good on a poster or your PC’s wallpaper (with Arthur, Merlin, Gwen and the sensational Katie McGrath as Morgana all ticking the boxes) with a couple of more established names (Anthony Head and Richard Willson) to give the whole thing a certain credence. The foruma works well. There is good interaction amongst the characters, although the conceit of having twenty-first century parlance does begin to grate on occasion.

The storylines have been a little cautious for the first few episodes, which is all you would expect in the early days but a few intriguing hints have been dropped along the way and there is, literally, a whole world of potential out there for new tales. Thus the future looks very solid from an artistic perspective so long as the viewing figures remain strong. Adding to the growing mythos, this evening’s episode sees the introducton of Lancelot, so I’m off to watch that and try to work out how to squeeze “Uther Pendragon” into a sing lyric.